Saturday, October 31, 2009

Halloween Horror

I thought I was gonna have a nice quiet evening tonite as I normally do on Halloween where its just me 'n my son 'n how tonite we were gonna sit down to a nice hot pot o' homemade chili that I slapped into the crockpot first thing this mornin' and oh by the way yes I'm cookin' tonite AGAIN thank you very much but anyway how after dinner we were simply both gonna go 'n do our own quiet lil' thing as usual while we ignore all the lil' shithead kids who may come a-knockin' at the door beggin' for treats cuz thankfully and I mean that sincerely our doorbell has been outta order for a couple of years now 'n besides that most of the candy that I bought for Halloween belongs in MY stomach 'n not THEIRS but apparently thats NOT gonna be the case at all cuz earlier this afternoon the kid asked if "just a couple" of friends could come over tonite 'n when I asked him "how many is just a couple" he responded with a "oh just Jeffrey & Glyndon & Dimitrius & maybe Ebony & her sister Amina &..." when I stopped him right then 'n there in his trax he proudly proclaimed "well at least Anthony ain't comin' cuz ya KNOW how much you HATE him" and how soooooo right he is about THAT 'n how its now 4:30 p.m. 'n I can hear that 2 of that handful of flamin' freaks is already sittin' in my livin' room actin' all silly 'n such 'n how I only made enuff chili for me 'n the kid so those freakish fools are just gonna have to dig deep in their holey pockets 'n come up with some kinda cash so they can at least order a pizza or somethin' for themselves cuz I'll be damned if *I'M* gonna feed 'em or pay for their damn food just cuz their Mommas don't give a rats ass if they ever getta damn hot meal or not 'n how even tho they just recently got here 'n how more are still expected to arrive the only thing on my mind is just how much longer am I gonna have to tolerate THIS shit tonite cuz I'm already irritated enuff but at least they're fairly quiet right now but all that'll change once Ebony gets here cuz SHE'S the LOUDEST 'n MOST OBNOXIOUS of 'em all but I still like the kid even tho she needs a good slap upside the head every now 'n then but don't MOST teenagers these days but then I'm thinkin' that all in all I'm pretty damn lucky cuz I've gotta pretty good kid who hangs out with a group of other pretty good kids even tho they ARE a lazy damn bunch who ain't got but one job between the six or so of 'em and IF we can even forget the fact that how a couple o' years ago my kid DID get arrested at age 15 for shopliftin' $600 some-odd-plus-dollars worth of GROCERIES and PLEEEEEZE don't even ASK me how the fuck ANYONE can load up a shoppin' cart with THAT amount of fuckin' items but it all makes sense cuz he WAS with those 3 low-life sister-bitches 'n their GASP! lil' 3 year old baby brother GASP! all of whom used to live across the street from us 'n how glad I am that THEY soon got evicted when their Momma got busted for drugs 'n for ho'in herself on 241st St. in The Bronx and how I just realized I got WAAAAAAY off track here with this post but what the hell I reckon I just hadda vent it all out anyway so anyway that's the story of how MY Halloween 2009 is shapin' up to be 'n how I'm sure I'll be back here tomorrow or sometime later than that to bitch about the rest of my nite with this maniacal group of misfit goblins Lord gimme strength or Mick gimme shelter or Bob gimme shelter from the storm or SOMEBODY gimme SOMETHIN' for my last nerve cuz Lord knows I'm gonna need it after tonite A-freakin'-men.

Annnnnnnnnnnnd speakin' of Amen......did I mention how some 23-year-old butt-naked crazy-ass bitch stood in front of a church here in The Bowels of Hell with her 5 month old son, lifted him over her head and slammed him down on the sidewalk 3 fuckin' times yesterday? Oh YES honey, see for yerself.......

Hang The Bitch

NOW do ya see WHY I call this dump The Bowels of Hell?

Typical Mount Vermin.


Lou said...

Terrible news story MDJ, I hope that the baby recovers and that she gets the help she so obviously needs.

Happy Halloween.

Punch said...

Lou is right.
I was just headed out to a party of over 40 gooles, think i'll thank my lucky whatevers.
Happy something or others, there Donna.

jadedj said...

Oh man MDJ, that last part is beyond belief. The first thing I thought of was Meth, but who the fuck knows.

Hope you recover from all this.

Cali said...

Clearly this woman has post-partum psychosis, but the first thing I wondered about is whether or not the baby has a priest father? Or is she so incapacitated that she believes God is the baby's father? If you read the comments to the linked story it's not overreaching to think she might be a little "religion crazy." Whatever her thought processes, this is horrific.

Lady Ridesalot said...

Shew! Let me catch my breath!

"I thought I was gonna have a nice quiet evening... (all the way till)... A-freakin'-men!"

Congratulations on composing the longest sentence ever written! That's what I call a rant! Your the queen and master of saying what's gotta be said, and... hang on if your gonna listen (read) or you'll fall right the hell off! Woo Hoo!

Hope your evening ended up without too much ruckus from the freaks. I survived mine, but I think that's because I looked scarier than the kids!

As far as that article you linked to at the bottom of your post... hopefully, that child will end up in better hands now. That's a very sad story.

Take care MDJ... the bowels are rumbling!

Sheila Mitchell said...

Whew! I think that IS the longest sentence ever! Love reading your posts, but am sad to hear about the baby & the crazy lady! Good Luck!

"Joker" said...

My head was spinnin' reading that one! Instead of gimme' shelter I think you should be praying for a U-haul and a new address! I couldn't handle living in Boston, never mind New York. I'm definitely not a city boy and would probably not last long there before I ended up in Sing Sing for blowing someone's goddamn head off. So I guess what I'm trying to say is I don't know how you do it and good luck!

Kill the bitch? Absolutely I say. But, New York is infested with bleeding heart liberals just like Mass is so they won't be strapping her into Old Sparky anytime soon. You see, we have to "help her." Translation: More of your tax dollars wasted on useless human refuse who will only be let out of the can one day so they can commit some more crimes.

Maybe they'll give her to David Patterson. I hear he likes a little "on the side."

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