Saturday, October 31, 2009

Crime Doesn't Pay......

......but apparently, it cost The Bowels $3 million, which to my non-accounting-educated-self, is a helluva lot.

But hey, we roll like that....just cuz we CAN.

You see, we here in The Good Ol' Bowels of Hell New York a/k/a Mount Vernon NY a/k/a Mt. Vermin NY have watched the number of gunfire fatalities amongst our young people outnumber the amount of months that they took place. If I am correct I believe we are currently at our 14th fatality of the year, all of which occurred during the last 10 months, or somethin' like that. If I'm not spot on with the exact numbers then I'm damn near close, that I know for sure.

So in order to respond to those outrageous numbers that just keep on goin' and growin' our fear not fearless county leader has come up with a brand new surefire spitfire idea called The ShotSpotter. You can read all about it here:

Snag-A-Slug

Apparently the damn thing actually WORKS too....for, as ya just read, it just DID. Its wee-mock-ah-bull!

And now YOU can be the next one on yer block to have yer very own ShotSpotter too! Alls ya gotta do is start blowin' each other away at the drop of a hat. Yes folks, it's THAT SIMPLE!

Dontcha just WANT ONE NOW?

6 comments:

Rob said...

We can read a car license plate from space, track gun shots via hidden camera's and put a patriot missile down a heat stack via a GPS Laser tracking device but not every child can get a immunization for the flue.

Cash Register Jockey said...

Perhaps you should be wearin' one of those kevlar vests every day when you go to work.

redbone said...

sssshhhh! be very quiet. or they might get you too!

Danny said...

The police here in my neighborhood could put that to good use.

Got to agree with Rob. The amount of money we spend on feeding kids (too little) compared to how much we spend bailing out banks (too much) is disgusting.

Mr. Charleston said...

What'll those assholes think of next? Right, Homey pops a cap in someone's ass and hauls ass. The cops are johnny on the scene, which I guess is better for the victim, but I don't see how the hell it's gonna help them catch Homey who by now is 10 blocks away.
Sounds like another "lets figure out a way to rip off a few more million from the quivvering public" Law Enforcement Industrial Complex scam to me.

Kathryn said...

Geez....interesting idea for crime prevention. Just don't forget to DUCK...if you hear anything POP. Yikes!