Saturday, July 30, 2011

Jury WHAT?

I KNEW I never shoulda registered to vote a coupla years back dammit, cuz as the letter I received in today's mail so clearly states...

"You are summoned to appear as a trial juror in the City Court of {The Bowels of Hell} on Monday, August 22, 2011 at 10:45 a.m."

Say WHAT? JURY DUTY? For ME? MeanDonnaJean? Why? Why ME? *I* can't be on a jury. I mean, I hate EVERYONE! And everything! I can't even make a firm damn decision about the kinda loaf of bread I need to buy, nonetheless havin' the life of someone else in these wanna-slap-anyone-who-annoys-the-shit-outta-me-on-a-everyday-basis hands of mine. Nope. Notta good thing, that's for sure. Besides, whether they be guilty or not, I'd probably wanna put 'em ALL behind bars, just for the helluvit. The less lunatics that *I* gotta regularly deal with on the streets, the better.

So I figure if I just pull a real true "Archie Bunker" type on 'em when it comes time to weedin' out all the nutcases who they feel ain't "worthy enuff" to serve, I outta be good, rite? I sure as hell am gonna give it a try, that's all I know.

55 years old, and NOW I get called to serve. And all on account of me desperately votin' for the first time in my life two years ago cuz of my desire to get rid of the weed-smokin' crackhead constantly-gettin'-arrested-but-always-covered-up-and-kept-hush-hush-about Mayor we used to have in office here.

I'd love to think it was MY vote that finally got rid of that encumbent asshole but ha ha, the jokes on me....cuz look who's payin' the price NOW. Ain't thatta kick in the ass!

8 comments:

Punch said...

Mean Donna J., I say just walk into the court room, take your seat and be yo' natural self. You have to chances in my best guess.
One it is a schoolmarm that ran a red light. You will not get picked.
Two, they have OBL's next of kin, named Osama Kin Laodon. You will be picked.
Hey I could be wrong.

Raftnn said...

We are of like mind..........

biker baby said...

I will probably never have to do jury duty.
Murder...nope...my brother was murdered…I now believe in the death penalty.
Car accident...not likely...we all know I've had my share and been on both sides.
Gangs...I lived in the heart of a gang area when I lived in Aurora...might even know one or two without knowing it.
Rape, domestic violence, or child abuse...let’s just say…notta chance.
There isn't much someone close to me or I myself haven’t been a victim of.
I bet if you search your memory real good, you can think of something that you can relate any crime to.

Webster World said...

Arthritis and your out of there.

Twitch said...

I don't know what you're worried about, when they call your name just wink at the defense table, works every time ;-)

A. Caraballo said...

I'm sure you can find a way to get out of it.

Willy D said...

Quit your bitching and do your civic duty! They ain’t gonna’ pick your smart-ass anyway. But if you gotta’ be there, do have some fun with them. Listen to Arlo’s ‘Alice’s Restaurant’. That should give you ideas on how to act when dealing with the bowels-o-hell legal system.

Mr. Charleston said...

Where the hell are you MeanDonnaJean? Get your lazy ass back to work.