Tuesday, February 15, 2011

No-Man's Land

Today at work I was expectin' a gentleman who's sellin' a large gorgeous piece of property in upstate NY to one of our clients to come into our office. Since he lives outta state I had originally sent him the deed and all the transfer documents to have him pre-sign 'em prior to closing so that he wouldn't have to attend the closing. But when I received all the paperwork back, I noticed he had failed to have his signature notarized on the deed (even tho I had sent him a typewritten, extremely detailed description on how and where to sign EACH document and which ones needed to be notarized....but, that's a guy for ya. They NEVER read instructions.)

Anyway, at about 12 somethin' he called 'n said he was on his way and that he would arrive in approximately 1.5 hours which ended up to be PERFECT timin' cuz my boss was fixin' on leavin' the office today by 2 p.m. sharp. At about 1:00 he calls 'n says that he's lost....that he's been tryin' to use his auto's navigation system but that when he enters in the actual name of our city (which as y'all know I have dubbed "The Bowels of Hell"), nuthin' comes up on his system. He says he's tried a few times and that he just doesn't understand what's goin' on.....then he asks me if there's another name for this city that he could enter into the system instead. Well, at that point I just couldn't help myself....after my first few giggles, I started crackin' up. I couldn't stop laughin'! Thankfully, HE was laughin' right along with me, but lil' did he know what *I* was laughin' at. He was soooo perplexed about WHY his system was not comin' up with a name that was even close to ours, and it was right then 'n there that I really wanted to blurt out "oh, wait....try The Bowels of Hell!". I just didn't have the heart to tell him that his nav system wasn't showin' us cuz "we're all blacked out" in this lovely lil' city of ours :-)

In the end however he DID finally make it to the office, and right in the nick of time, too. The boss was just packin' up to go 'n I myself was gettin' a bit anxious. So at the last minute I had him sign a new deed and I thanked him & wished him well. It was then he confessed that he wasn't enterin' the name of our city into his system completely spelled out -- he was usin' its abbreviation & claims that's why he was havin' all that trouble findin' us. But *I* still believe its cuz he's a white guy who was tryin' to locate an entirely blacked out land ;-)

And now for a brief MDJ comment-to-comment moment:

Lady Ridesalot: Yes, u most certainly still ARE here, my dear....& thank God for THAT! Jeez, I thought damn near everyone had pulled a MDJ on Blogger and had hi-tailed it on outta here. And even tho I still ain't been able to keep my eyes open for any longer than to check my 3 e-mail accounts and/or update a bit here 'n there, I DO plan on somehow, someway, someday gettin' caught up with those of u here who remained steadfast & who didn't desert me durin' my MIA period...such as yerself, to whom I once again tip my hat 'n say thank you.

Punch: I reckon the difference between u & me is that (and sometimes very stupidly I might add) my "I don't give a shit" attitude far outweighs my fear of repercussions from family re my FB posts. Last nite I even brought this same subject up to my younger bro on account of a cross-country-livin'-but-much-older-cousin of ours requested to add me as a FB friend. I was a bit worried that one day she may suddenly grasp her chest while readin' my shit...and if she should expire while in the midst, I'll also have THAT death weighin' heavily on my mind for the rest of my life. I later came to the conclusion that "hey, WTF....SHE asked for it!" as I quickly hit the "confirm" button ;-)


Lady Ridesalot said...

Every time I ask my hubby if we should get a GPS his response is the same... "why? I can read a map."

Hope you were able to ditch out a little early yourself. Nothing feels better than an extra hour of "no work".

Thanks for the shout out MDJ... I for one am glad your back. I enjoy your sarcastic wit and razor sharp tongue. It makes me smile.

Have a nice day my friend.

bobskoot said...


I'm glad you're back . I've missed you too.

and I don't know how I would survive trips without a GPS, esp on unfamiliar roads.

Wet Coast Scootin

Willy D said...

Crap, I ain’t sure NYC would work in one of those gizmos. Might have to enter Da’ Bronx or Brooklyn. Might be interesting to see where it told you to go if you did enter ‘The Bowles of Hell”. Then again, my GPS is how much gas I’ve got in the tank. So I really have no damn idea what I’m talking about.