Friday, July 17, 2009

Incoming! Hit the deck!!!

Today Mr. Boss Man asked me to pen a classified ad to put on the help wanted/employment section of Craigslist, somethin' which neither one of us has ever actually done before I might add. But there's always a first, so what the heck.

My initial thought was that since its only been the 3 of, The Accountant and Mr. Boss the job for all these years, that maybe my job was in some kinda jeopardy. But on second thought I figured what kinda guy would The Boss Man actually be to have ME type up a classified ad to fill MY I relaxed a bit and when into his office to ask for all the details. Apparently we're lookin' for a part time accountant/ who can assist our accountant with his daily accounting duties, since its quite obvious that ours has been drownin' in work for the last 6 or so years. I got down all the basics 'n I began writin'. The Boss wanted all resume replies to go to my business email address instead of his or instead of gettin' phone calls/faxes, so I typed up a quick lil' local ad, ran it by The Boss Man, and then posted it on Craigslist....thinkin' to myself the entire time that this basic tiny lil' local help wanted ad (and The Boss' $25 payment for said ad) was probably the biggest waste of time 'n money ever spent.

Boy oh boy, was *I* wrong.

Within a matter of minutes....20 minutes TOPS....I was gettin' email replies. And when I say I was gettin' email replies, I mean I was gettin' email replies up the wazoo! These suckers were flyin' in like bullets durin' a bank robbery. I felt like I was bein' attacked! I got replies from India (fuckin' INDIA? What's he gonna do....commute to NY on a weekly basis?), Washington state, upstate NY, downstate CT, Oregon (WTF? can't people READ? the ad says "Lower Westchester County Area"...are they gonna up 'n move themselves halfway across the country for a part time temporary position?), and we got others from who knows where else. After lookin' at those stupid responses, I got disgusted 'n just forwarded the rest of the damn things to our Accountant's email for HIM to deal with. I just ain't got the patience to sift thru all that stupidity. I mean, sooooo many people either a) forgot to include a cover letter with their emailed resume, b) forgot to attach their resume or references to the email, c) couldn't spell worth a lick, d) didn't include any contact info, e) wrote what seemed like a 22 page long commentary on how special they were 'n why we should hire 'em, or f) had the qualifications of a fuckin' flea.

I mean damn, here it was 2:15 p.m. on a Friday afternoon 'n I'm left to deal with this idiotic shit. Oh no, not today.....its freakin' damn near 90 humid-ass degrees outside, I've gotta walk on over to the bank to cash my check 'n then I've gotta try 'n crawl my way home in this swelterin' heat. So, I think NOT. It's late as it is 'n the clock is countin' down to my 2:30 leavin' time. Besides, by this time I had had enuff. I closed out my emails went 'n said my "goodbyes/have a good weekends" 'n I hi-tailed it on outta there in a hurry.....

......just to have to deal with it all over again come Monday mornin'.

That outta be tons o' fun. Gee, I can't wait.

Maybe I'll bring in my own gun on Monday 'n I'll do my own self in. I'm sure it'll be much less painful that way ;-)


RazorsEdge2112 said...

Lordy, that brings back memories. Seems like any time I advertised for open positions the idiots just crawled out of the woodwork.

A while back, in order to filter out the bots and obviously undesirables, here is what my boss did... In the job posting, he had a list of things for the candidate to include in the e-mail: Resume (in Word or PDF format); contact info; three professional references AND the subject of the e-mail MUST be (something like) "PROGRAMMER POSITION ABC123 NV"

He had an e-mail address set up for the responses. Any e-mail that did not have that subject was immediately thrown in the bit-bucket. About 75% of all the resumes and crud we received ended up right there. Hard to believe that people looking for employment can't even follow simple directions like that.

Best of luck to ya.

Lady Ridesalot said...

Sounds like a cluster f*#k!
Enjoy your weekend! Then...if you take your gun to work on Monday... spare yourself and shoot the computer!

Then go take a break. LOL!

All kidding aside... sounds like a pain in the arse going through this process. Razor has a good idea... letting the puter weed out the "smart ones". Good luck!!

mq01 said...

bring a gun, lol...i had a guy bring his sword to show off at work once... had to send the poor guy home. :)