Wednesday, July 29, 2009

20/20

I've just hit the ol' dashboard 'n have gone thru about 20 blogs that I haven't had the chance to read these past few days, yet after all that eyeballin' o' all those words I couldn't think of one damn comment to leave for ANYBODY.

20 blogs 'n notta word outta my mouth.

Perhaps its cuz its now about 8:45 p.m. 'n I've just come outta my days coma; perhaps its cuz I'm in somewhat of a rush to get to the kitchen 'n quench my thirst; or perhaps its cuz the only thing on my mind right now is that in approximately 7 hours it'll be the 20th anniversary of my husband's death. That's all I've been thinkin' of this past week or so. I honestly can't believe its been twenty years since he's been gone.

20 fuckin' years.

He was only 36, which was way too young to die. I was just 33, which was much too young to become a widow. Our oldest child was 17; our youngest was 5. And here I sit today, precisely 20 years after the fact, wonderin' where in the hell twenty years went.

I'm takin' the day off work tomorrow. I'm gonna take the time to laugh, to mourn, to remember 'n to cry; to pull out the boxes 'n boxes o' pics I've collected over the much too short a time we had together 'n to take a walk down memory lane.

I'm also hopin' for a long overdue spiritual visit from that crazy man himself. I'm prayin' he won't lemme down.

10 comments:

Webster World said...

So sorry you lost your husband. 20 yrs can go by fast. With you going down memory lane I'll bet he'll stop by for a visit. Just keep it on the up side. I'm sure too you will giggle, laugh, cry and bitch as you look at your pictures. What ever... you just have a good day.

Mr. Charleston said...

You take the day off DonnaJean. When you get through with all the memories and stuff, get on that Harley and go for a ride. It'll make you smile.

mq01 said...

hugs!!! enjoy your visit :)

Baron's Life said...

I feel for you...you need to come out of your grief and let go..He's with the Lord...Yours must have been a very strong love...!
God bless you and keep you and your children safe and happy

Baron's Life said...

Got something for you on my blog Babe and you don't even have to shave, massage or wax anything...It's just for your beautiful soul...
Congrats on winning a well deserved award

RazorsEdge2112 said...

DonnaJean, I raise my glass to you tonight and my thoughts shall be with you two tomorrow.

The Peach Tart said...

Ms MeanDonnaJean - I'm sure the hubby is looking down and thinking your thinking ain't stinking. I'm sure he's got a big ass smile on his face at the way you have persevered. I'm sure he's proud of the woman you have become. I'm sure he is with you in spirit every day.

mq01 said...

thinking strongly of ya today...wanted to check back in and send a hug from the west coast. xoxo

Lady Ridesalot said...

Peace~ and hugs. I'm thinkin' of ya.

Punch said...

I know this is late, but i wanted to leave a word for you. Most people do not understand transistions. I don't really understand them, yet here i am reading your post of spiritual understanding. That is the nature of Spirit. I am sadden by your loss of 20 years ago, and lifted by your post of tomorrow. (chuckle, i have already read the sign from BillyOne) I hope i am not too familiar.